We are not alone.

I guess I thought this 30-day challenge thing would keep me posting regularly, but life gets crazy.
Missed 10, 11, so I'll go ahead and do those today, along with 12

#10. Person you do the craziest things with.

I DID dance with Heidi Carver in Wal-mart... but if I had to answer this question honestly, I think I get crazier depending on the people I'm around. If I'm around shy people, I tend to be more obnoxious and theatrical, to compensate (I must need a certain amount of wildness in my life)
If I'm around theatrical people, I am content to sit back and enjoy the show. Competitive as I can be, I've put social competitions behind me. I'm okay. You're okay. Let's not go around trying to out-do each other.

#11. A picture of something you hate.

People have put a lot of things for this: jeggings, Justin Bieber, Glee.... All things that, really, are pretty harmless.
I thought of putting up a picture of the band 30 Seconds to Mars, but... I think I've forgiven them in my heart.
I hate math. Actually, I hate logic. I must be a totally right-brained person, because all of the left-brain traits just bother me. Calculating, analytical people are great, but the odds that I'll ever sit down and logic something out are slim. Also, chess bewilders me. Some people love chess. Some people are champions at chess. Some people will base all their judgement on your character by how you play chess. I think it's a game, and a much less entertaining one than Candyland or Husker Du.

#12. A picture of something you love.
Should speak for itself.

~~~~

The past few days I have obviously not been posting, and during those days, not much has happened.

Friday - took my GSP, passed my GSP, discipleship (watched Furious Love), went to a psychological study, Loverlies practice, Worldlife!
Saturday - stayed in dorm all day. watched a musical, ate popcorn, studied.

Friday night after Worldlife, in kerr lobby, me and Grace had an encounter with this guy that had a heart full of darkness. I think it put me into a bit of a funk, not because he didn't listen to what I had to say, (at the end he was conceding my point) but I became aware of a level of darkness in people.
He was just very deceptive, in the name of kindness, and that scared me. I really trust people. I try to be open and honest and vulnerable - vulnerable in spite of severe fragility.

I like to think that it's worth the risk. Most days, I don't even have a reason to worry. People want to be kind and do the right thing most of the time.
But, I heard Marshall say in parish on Wednesday, some people are just wicked. They want to tear other people down. I think this view is Biblical - some people have hearts that are so hard and cold, that you should keep your most precious and vulnerable things safe from them.
Safety. I guess I didn't think much of it.

Jesus ate with the tax collectors and prostitutes, so I thought Scripture tells us to go out and love the unlovely. Martyrs are a prime example of how love doesn't need to be safe.

I wasn't in any real danger. I wasn't even close to having my spirit crushed. The guy even told me that he was amazed at my "unshakeable faith." I think the armor of God was definitely surrounding my spirit.
But I learned that this was a guy so deceptive, so cold, that I couldn't open my heart and love him properly. I needed armor just to be around him.

I seriously doubt I'll ever see this guy again. But I planted a seed in darkness. Maybe it wasn't for nothing.

Saturday I was kind of in a funk, like I said... People around me were also trying to overcome trials, it just felt like a dark day. But I remembered what Jon Foreman had said in one of his Huffington Post articles.. about how he doesn't write songs when he's happy. He writes them when he's fighting darkness - the songs are anthems of hope, he is shaking his fist at the hopelessness and lies. So I scampered off to the practice room, and wrote a song about standing firm, being bold, rebuking all the fear and darkness - a song about joy and courage in the midst of scary things.

We don't have to be afraid.
We are not the prisoners of the enemy.
We are not alone.
Our Champion is not dead. He's not sleeping. He hasn't left His children.
He told us, just before His ascension:

"I will be with you always, even until the very end of the age."