The way things look.

I've kind of been messing around with how I want the blog to look, without really adding any content, which is strange.

I guess I'm vacillating between cutesy and too cutesy, and I'm leaning toward the latter.

So, I guess what I usually write about is what I'm learning about and doing. That used to be what I wrote about... haha...

There are three things.

1. School is out. I leave for Fort Worth wednesday morning.
2. I am moving out of Crow House and moving into Untitled House. I really want to give it a good name, but I can't really think of one... I was thinking about maybe another bird name, like Dove, or something literary, like Thrushcross Grange, or Little Whinging, or something...
3. Spiritually, I've been better. I've also been worse.

If I compared myself now to myself a year ago, I'm not sure that I would readily take this condition over my condition a year ago, simply because I think I had more childlike faith back then. Loving God and loving others felt easier. Doing crazy things and dreaming crazy dreams, really.

On the other hand... I've learned so much. There are certain things now that I'm putting into practice. Temperance. Forbearance. Prudence. I'm learning to hold my tongue. I'm being careful and discerning. I'm trying to guard my heart.

Maybe I'm wrong, but, I think people used to hold me in higher esteem than they do now. I remember, when I used to talk, suddenly I wasn't speaking out of what I knew, but what I felt led to say... I miss the feeling of being used. I miss feeling like the Spirit was speaking through me.

But there is hope.

I am convinced and persuaded through the granting of so many prayers and a general clarity of the Lord's faithfulness to pursue me that I am a member of the elect.
I don't mean to sound arrogant... rather, I want to say that I'm convinced that the Lord is after me. He's gone to great lengths and given me dreams that have made it impossible for me to deny His existence.

That being said, I haven't pursued Him nearly as well.

I really think that's the main difference. I was chasing the Lord with all my heart last year. My new year's resolution (yes - I'm making it before Christmas) is to resume that chase.

Christ be with you, friends.